Guess Who Popped In Unannounced For Tea?

Look who decided to drop in for tea this afternoon?  Whose mum-in-law does that?  WITH a  Royal Corgi, I might add.

Oh.  I stepped in poo, thankyouverymuch. (The Corgi's...just to make it clear.)

Honk.

All I Want Is A Tidy Vom Bag. Is That So Difficult? Oh, And Polished Silver.

It appears The Royal Blabbermouth has indeed blabbed that The Royal Baby shall be born in July of 2013.  While running about, making announcements, one would assume someone--and at this juncture, I don't care whom--could fetch me a box of Vom Bags.  

These, to be precise:

This travel bag is designed for children and adults who suffer from travel sickness. It features a hygienic bag for urine or vomit and a refreshing cleaning wipe. The pocket-sized pack fits easily into handbags and glove compartments Available in a pack containing three individually packaged travel bags, 25cm x 25 cm with a pad able to absorb and solidify up to 500ml of vomit or urine.

May I kindly suggest that I'm asking for these VOM BAGS so that I may handle my unsightly condition in privacy? (Will They ever stop making me utter that product name?)

I will continue to pull a pinched smile as best as I am able. But without a proper Vom Bag tucked into my clutch, it will be YOU cleaning the sick off of ME.

I'm waiting.  The silver is waiting to be polished.  Bloody hell. I'm turning into Madonna.